I'll go ahead and I'll use the knocker in a completely normal way and knock on the door.
Isaac Allen Burns:You do so, and almost immediately, the door slowly opens up as you see a stern dwarven man who has opened the door. He is clearly the attendant here. He looks at you and says, pray tell what you three are doing here. Do you have a audience with the Burgermeister?
Rowan Collins:Yeah. We have an audience with the Burgermeister. We have a message from his fallen brother.
Isaac Allen Burns:Fallen brother? As he drunk himself into a stupor once again, found himself in a ditch. Has he
Annie Hawthorne:He's dead.
Isaac Allen Burns:Excuse me? Did you just say he was,
Annie Hawthorne:dead? I did?
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, dear. Well, this is quite dire news. Alright. Katarina. And he calls out to this Qatari woman, dressed like a maid.
Isaac Allen Burns:She's currently dusting something. She walks over to all of you tripping on the corner of the rug. It's clear she's very clumsy. And walks up, and this dwarven butler says, Katarina, take these three to see the Burgemeiser at once. They have terrible, terrible news.
Isaac Allen Burns:You see that a single tear goes down his eye as he shuts the door behind you and turns and walks away. And Katarina bows way too quickly and says, follow me, and I'll take you to the Burgermeister. And she turns and starts walking away.
Annie Hawthorne:Why is no one in this town normal? You
Isaac Allen Burns:follow her up some steps up the grand foyer of this place to the double doors at the top of the stairs, a sign at the very front that reads Burgermeister's office. You see that she stands there and kind of smiles and does like a weird curtsy and says, right inside.
Rowan Collins:We like the word within.
Isaac Allen Burns:Within inside.
Rowan Collins:We heard you. And DJ will waddle into, I assume, a closed door. So they will just like pop.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, dear. That's not how you use doors. Here, let me show you. And she kind of pats you on the shoulder and then pushes the door handle open and opens the doors for you.
Rowan Collins:We thank you, and we waddle in.
Isaac Allen Burns:You waddle in, and the three of you step into an office. This is a palatial office. There are bookshelves taller than any of you lining the walls. There are books all over them too. There are pictures of Highcliffe's development.
Isaac Allen Burns:Pictures like those old city pictures of what it looked like back in '17 whatever. That's what's all over the walls here. Clearly, history can be felt here. You can smell it in here. And at the desk, you see two individuals.
Isaac Allen Burns:Sitting behind the desk is a withered, old, gaunt, giant man. His beard is scraggly and unkempt. His eyes are glazed over and unfocused, and he sits frailly behind the desk, his hands resting upon them. Next to him is a ribbit, a frog like individual. He's got long, black, greasy hair.
Isaac Allen Burns:His eyes have red irises, and he wears a black cloak and a frock of sorts with a collar that goes up really high. And as the three of you step in, you see that the Rivet leans over and whispers into the giant man's ears, and the giant man kind of welcome to this office. Who are you? State your name. Z.
Joe Diametti:Hi, sir. M Kinsey. It's a pleasure to meet you.
Annie Hawthorne:Hello, mister Burgermeister. I'm May. We
Rowan Collins:are section d processor j, otherwise known as DJ.
Isaac Allen Burns:You see the ribbit leans over and whispers something into his ear, and he says, what business do you have here?
Annie Hawthorne:I'm afraid we've come with some rather dark tidings. So your brother has been murdered.
Isaac Allen Burns:You see, he doesn't react, and the Ribbit leans over and, like, whispers into his ear. And he says, my brother is dead to me anyways. I do not care for him.
Annie Hawthorne:So you have any idea why he might be trying to warn you of thing of something?
Isaac Allen Burns:You see the rivet leans over and whispers into the guy's ear, and he says, no. He's a useless rake who spent all of daddy's money on booze. He is good for nothing. That is why he is dead to me, and I do not love him. You see a single tear goes down the man's face.
Rowan Collins:We have a question for your ribbit, please. May we speak with your assistant?
Isaac Allen Burns:Who? Me? I'm simply standing here observing. Do not even think that I'm here. Imagine I'm not even here.
Isaac Allen Burns:Well, then why
Annie Hawthorne:don't you step out? Take a break.
Isaac Allen Burns:He whispers into the giant's ear. Giant says, no. My aid, Badjoy, stays here at all times and detends me.
Joe Diametti:Reminds me
Annie Hawthorne:Attends you.
Joe Diametti:Uh-huh. This reminds me of a show I saw. Do you remember, Mae, we were passing through that town right before we found DJ? And there was a little wood prop and a man with his arm up a felt costume.
Annie Hawthorne:I do remember that.
Joe Diametti:And he didn't want us to see him moving the mouth or the puppet.
Annie Hawthorne:Yes. I do remember that.
Isaac Allen Burns:You see the roommate speaks up and says, if I do assume you're speaking of me as a puppet master, think nothing of it. That could not be further from the truth. I'm not doing anything. He holds his hands up so you can see his hands. I'm not doing anything.
Isaac Allen Burns:And then he leans in and whispers to the giant's ear. And the giant says, my joy is not doing anything.
Joe Diametti:Dang. I'm out of ideas then.
Rowan Collins:We would like to open up a telepathic connection to the Burger Master themselves. Yeah. So it just says on my spell that I can open up a line of mental communication with one Target that I can see since DJ doesn't have eyes. I want to say just like is in the same room sense with. And the connection lasts until you can use the spell to connect with another creature.
Rowan Collins:Nice. So I want to connect directly to the Burger Master and just go. We believe you might be, controlled. Please let us know if there is free will in your body still.
Isaac Allen Burns:Does can the target respond?
Rowan Collins:The target responds. Yes.
Isaac Allen Burns:You connect and you say that and you hear, by the nine, please help me. I can't move my arms or my legs. Is it true my brother's dead? Oh, no. My brother's dead.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh my god. You gotta help me. You gotta help me. I'm not that old. I'm not that old.
Isaac Allen Burns:Help me.
Rowan Collins:No worries. One moment. We turn towards the frog and we go nighty night. And we, like, put down the lullaby thing again, and we're gonna try and put this guy to sleep.
Isaac Allen Burns:Okay. Very good. Go ahead and roll the dice on this. Let's see if you can beat Badjoy Snake Talker's difficulty. Also, for those curious, this guy's first name is spelled b a d g u y.
Rowan Collins:This is a 16 with fear.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, a 16 with fear. You. This is great, actually. Okay. So it's a 16 with fear.
Isaac Allen Burns:That is incredibly, if y'all can believe it, a success. With fear, he sees what's going on. He sees the magic coming, And he his eyes go wide as he says, you'll never get me. And as he jumps out the window, the spell hits him and he falls asleep. And he shatters through the window and falls to the ground.
Annie Hawthorne:How far is the ground?
Isaac Allen Burns:The ground? You went up the equivalent of, like, three flights of steps. So he fell 30 feet.
Annie Hawthorne:I'm gonna look out the window after him just to see what the chances are that he survived.
Isaac Allen Burns:You look out the window and you see that the the hotdog guy was wheeling his cart closer to the bag, and you see that this guy landed on his hotdog cart. My hotdogs. That's what you hear. By the night, my hot dogs. What am I gonna do?
Isaac Allen Burns:And you see that Bad Joy is definitely dead the moment he dies.
Joe Diametti:A hot dog cart explosion?
Isaac Allen Burns:A hot dog cart explodes.
Joe Diametti:Really went up.
Isaac Allen Burns:Yeah. Explosion went up. Duck cart explodes. Put an explosion here. Boom.
Isaac Allen Burns:Put it right here. Big explosion. You see the old giant unwithers and undecays, and you see a man that looks like a couple years older than the dead man in the alleyway comes to. His skin becomes supple and soft. His beard becomes nice to touch.
Isaac Allen Burns:And his head still as bald as the day he was born, but he rocks it. He stands there and, like, stands up really quick and then falls over because he probably hasn't been able to use his legs in a while. And he says, oh my gods. Oh, by the night. Oh, my legs.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, my limbs are asleep. Oh, no. I've been sitting for so long. I have pins and needles all over my body. Everything hurts.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, everything hurts. Have I mentioned everything hurts? Someone help me. Oh my god.
Joe Diametti:I'll help you.
Joe Diametti:And I, like, use my wings as, like, strength to, like, hold them up.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, an angel. Thank you.
Rowan Collins:Are happy that you are back, Meister. We are sorry that you were stuck in that prison for who knows how long.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, it was it was hell. You made me do so many things. All of you, we have so little time that I have to trust the three of you with this very important thing. We have so little time. The narrative demands it.
Isaac Allen Burns:Listen. Camped outside of the town is a handful, a legion of the rebel prince's forces ready to barge in on this town. You have to stop it. I don't know exactly what he was doing, but that nasty toad who certainly killed my brother, he sheds multiple tears, Fred says. There was a warehouse that I believe he would go to.
Isaac Allen Burns:You'll find the address down below in his quarters. They're on the First Floor in the back hallway. When he returned, he was carrying something. I don't know what it was. He's been poisoning me for so long.
Isaac Allen Burns:His nasty little ribbit hands on my brain. Feels good to be alive again. You must do this. You must save the town in memory of my brother, who really did drink way too much. What's sad
Isaac Allen Burns:is that he was right. He was useless, but he was never dead to me.
Joe Diametti:I'm sorry, sir.
Isaac Allen Burns:That's okay. I will grieve in my own time. Grief will find me on a beautiful summer's day far in the future.
Rowan Collins:God.
Joe Diametti:We we do have to It just because we saved you, it's a quick signature here and then you Oh,
Isaac Allen Burns:and you decide something?
Joe Diametti:It's quick.
Isaac Allen Burns:Yeah. This is like a contract of okay.
Joe Diametti:Not a contract. It's more just how we keep track of the people that we save.
Isaac Allen Burns:Yeah. Okay. Make a presence roll for me.
Joe Diametti:I'm gonna get four signatures. Fuck. It's a it's a four which isn't because minus one is three. With hope. Oh, with hope.
Joe Diametti:Yeah. Nope.
Annie Hawthorne:Okay. All that. I'm gonna lean over into the Burgermeister and say, I wouldn't sign it if I were you.
Isaac Allen Burns:He looks at you and says, yeah. I don't think so either. I don't I don't sign anything unless I can read it, and I can already tell this has bullshit all over it. He says, well, kid, you know what? You leave that paper on my desk, and I'll get around to it.
Joe Diametti:No. I can't leave it. No.
Isaac Allen Burns:You can't leave it?
Joe Diametti:We'll just go save whatever.
Isaac Allen Burns:Alright. Yeah. You go check out check out his quarters if you want. I'm sure there'll be clues down there. Okay.
Isaac Allen Burns:Thank you for saving me. Yeah. Your kindness will be remembered. You're welcome. You've done a great thing this spring Praise splendid.
Isaac Allen Burns:Solstice. Okay. Yeah. Okay.
Rowan Collins:We are happy to have assisted you. Please think of us fondly.
Isaac Allen Burns:He canceled the festival too. I have to do so much work to do that to get that back on stage. Festival? Yeah. There was gonna be a spring solstice festival, but he had me cancel it clearly so that people would either be upset or so that people wouldn't be congregated in one place.
Isaac Allen Burns:I don't quite know. But, oh, I'm a have to do so much work. How will the people be able to celebrate the spring solstice without a festival? Anyways, this is a problem for me to handle. You three just go about your day and figure out what the heck do the thing I told you to do, please.
Isaac Allen Burns:I beg you.
Joe Diametti:So we go to the the room, right, on the First Floor?
Isaac Allen Burns:You go to the room downstairs, and as you open the door, you see inside the equivalent of a bad guy's lair, Plans everywhere. Clearly, this guy was up to no good. However, standing inside, you see Katarina, the maid that you saw before. You also see around her shoulders is this beautiful golden mantle. Those who don't know, those are like almost like half capes that drape around the shoulders and such.
Joe Diametti:Mhmm.
Isaac Allen Burns:And you see that she's standing in front of a full length mirror just kinda like checking herself out wearing it. It is oozing with magic. So much so that when you open it, you're awed by her. Your eyes go wide as you see this, and you are almost compelled to listen to anything she says. She turns around and says, oh, hi, everybody.
Isaac Allen Burns:What are you doing here?
Joe Diametti:By Splendor. Wow. Yeah.
Rowan Collins:We have never noticed how much of an aura you give.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, people tell me that all the time.
Rowan Collins:Yes. Please tell giving
Joe Diametti:magic.
Rowan Collins:It's giving charisma.
Isaac Allen Burns:People do say my eyes are quite magical.
Rowan Collins:We cannot see them to say, but we like your voice. Would you mind speaking more, please?
Isaac Allen Burns:Of course. I would be happy to. What are you three doing here? And she looks at you, May, and, like, flutters around at you.
Annie Hawthorne:Why don't you tell us what you're doing here?
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, well, I was I've never been allowed inside this room to clean it, and I thought, wow. I bet it's so dirty in here. I should go check it out. And then I heard the explosion of the hot dog cart outside. I knew and I smelled fried frog.
Isaac Allen Burns:And that told me that that weird guy that hung around the Burgermeister is definitely dead. So I figured, what better chance to clean this room? So when I walked in here, ready to clean and dust and sweep, I found this beautiful golden mantle that was just sitting on this desk. So I decided to try it on, and now I feel really good trying it on. I feel so good.
Isaac Allen Burns:I don't wanna take this thing off.
Annie Hawthorne:Quite beautiful. Why don't you let me try it on?
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, no. I wouldn't wanna part with this. I really like it.
Rowan Collins:I see. We understand. We can understand that. You sound as pretty as you probably look.
Isaac Allen Burns:Well, thank you, little weird guy. That's really nice. We
Rowan Collins:would like you to continue speaking, please.
Isaac Allen Burns:Sure.
Annie Hawthorne:Yes. Tell us all about that weird frogman.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, well, he came in about a month ago and he showed up here. And he talked to the Burgermeister, and next thing we know, mister Burgermeister, whose name is mister Bergman, sent out a big thing that said that this guy was now his aide and had to stay next to him at all times. And if he wasn't ever next to him, we weren't allowed to talk to mister Bergman at all, which I thought was really crazy. But, you know, it's government. And she shrugs.
Rowan Collins:We understand exactly all of those words that you have since saying. DJ nods and then look like, turns their head over to Mei and goes, we don't understand it.
Isaac Allen Burns:You know, this thing feels really great. And, you know, I bet mister Bergman isn't a very good judge of character, seeing how that frog guy was actually, probably, really bad. And he looked like he didn't take care of his hair at all whatsoever. It looked so oily. I think I'll go up there and give mister Bergman a piece of my mind.
Isaac Allen Burns:And she strides past you wearing the mantle.
Annie Hawthorne:Before you leave, perhaps you should think about how much of that hair oil is on that mantle.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, my. You're right. I'll probably have to wash it later. I wouldn't dare take this off at all whatsoever by my own choice.
Annie Hawthorne:Why don't I take it off for you then?
Joe Diametti:What? Oh.
Annie Hawthorne:And I just grab the back of the mantle. Uh-huh. And I try to rip it off.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, okay. This will be a strength roll. The difficulty of this will be a 13.
Rowan Collins:Considering you said you're gonna take it off of her as enclosed, does that trigger your experience, Annie?
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, I don't know. Is this lesbian audacity? Or is it punch first, ask questions later?
Rowan Collins:I think it's lesbian audacity. Alright.
Annie Hawthorne:Cool. That's a plus too. Oh, that is a 15 plus sixteen, seventeen, 18 with fear.
Isaac Allen Burns:With fear, incredible. I'm gonna say, so here's exactly what happens. You grab this mantle and a wave of magic pours over you. You can feel great power coming from this. You see yourself standing in front of a crowd of people who are listening to your every word.
Isaac Allen Burns:Up at the very front is your whole clan looking up at you with respect, with reverence almost, as you can see yourself standing above all of them. The light coming out of you just glowing over all of them. That vision shoots through your mind the moment you touch this. And before you know it, not only is that mantle in your hands, but Katarina is laying on the floor completely passed out.
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, that was easier than I expected.
Joe Diametti:How does it feel?
Annie Hawthorne:Feels great.
Joe Diametti:Can I
Isaac Allen Burns:try it?
Rowan Collins:We believe that that is the mantle that the letter, the paper was referring to.
Annie Hawthorne:Was was the box big enough for this?
Isaac Allen Burns:Definitely.
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, okay. It was a big box. I'm just thinking it was like a trinket box.
Rowan Collins:It expanded to the size. So Can
Isaac Allen Burns:I try it? May. We
Rowan Collins:do not believe that any of us should put it on. We should take it to where it's supposed to be. Oh, just
Annie Hawthorne:touching it is quite the trip, I have to say. Why don't we all just touch it at the same time?
Joe Diametti:Okay.
Rowan Collins:We are not sure that would be wise, but we will do as you
Joe Diametti:Kinsey touches it.
Isaac Allen Burns:Kinsey, you touch it. A wave of magic pours through your mind. Kinsey, you see yourself standing on a large stage speaking the words and teachings of splendor to all who listen. You look in the crowd and you see every person you've ever met, every person you've asked for signatures of who've ever said no. They're looking up at you with their hands stained with ink from their signatures that they definitely made.
Isaac Allen Burns:They're listening to you right now in this moment.
Rowan Collins:Uh-oh.
Isaac Allen Burns:That's what you feel.
Joe Diametti:Hail, splendor. Hail, splendor. Splendor. Hail, splendor.
Rowan Collins:We touch it as well.
Isaac Allen Burns:DJ, you touch it. You feel magic pour through your mind. As DJ, you can perceive yourself standing on a stage looking out, a bunch of people looking at you. We have
Rowan Collins:cage fright. We can't be on hand. Do not like the
Isaac Allen Burns:Wait a minute. Wait. Wait. Wait. Put your hands back.
Isaac Allen Burns:Put your hands back. Hands back.
Rowan Collins:Hands back.
Joe Diametti:Okay. It's become very clear to me that I've got the mic on the stage and May has like a bass guitar for Paris and May's clan is there and all my people are there with their ink
Isaac Allen Burns:just bask in this dream. Who puts it on, gang?
Rowan Collins:We think we should put this in the box.
Joe Diametti:I think that I would kill both of you for this.
Annie Hawthorne:As if you could. Do you think that I'd like to see you try, and I just try to jerk it out of both of their hands. I'm better than DJ,
Rowan Collins:it's gonna hold on as much as possible.
Isaac Allen Burns:Very good. I think this is gonna be strength checks from everybody. Nice.
Joe Diametti:Strength is plus two. Oh,
Rowan Collins:I'm gonna Please,
Joe Diametti:for the love of God, I just want this Damn it. No.
Rowan Collins:No. Can I use my experience called spinny fingers?
Joe Diametti:Can I use my experience called through splendor, all things are good?
Isaac Allen Burns:You know, in this specific case, because it is splendor, I will say yes. And what
Rowan Collins:was yours, Ryan? Mine is spinny fingers.
Isaac Allen Burns:Spinny fingers? I want to know right now. What are spinny fingers?
Rowan Collins:So in my mind, was that you could spin things on your fingers, right? So I want to like, use the dexterousness of my fingers to just like keep touching it when I'm not.
Isaac Allen Burns:You know what? Why not? Sure.
Annie Hawthorne:Got nothing.
Isaac Allen Burns:Uh-oh. Okay.
Annie Hawthorne:Slip straight out of my hands.
Isaac Allen Burns:Alright. So what did everyone roll?
Rowan Collins:I swear to you, I did not. I'm gonna I'm gonna Scotty, you're foolish.
Annie Hawthorne:Probably for the best.
Isaac Allen Burns:That's double sevens.
Annie Hawthorne:I rolled four. I This is
Joe Diametti:prob it's a problem. It's this is this know? Probably for the best. Yeah. This is probably for the best.
Joe Diametti:DJ,
Isaac Allen Burns:you see a moment where the two of them are yanking back and forth this thing, and you're able to slip your little spinny fingers in there and slip it out of their hands before they even realize what's happened. And before anyone can stop you, around your shoulders is the orc mantle. Almost immediately, there is a implosion of magic within you, DJ. The following things are now true about you. Are you ready?
Rowan Collins:Oh god. Oh, hold on. No. I wanted to put it in the box. Okay.
Rowan Collins:Alright. I'm ready.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, if you wanna resist it, go ahead and make, in this case, make a roll of your choice. The DC for this is a 20.
Rowan Collins:I'm gonna use I think because they understand that this is a bad thing. It's like a knowledge. So they're trying to, like, logic their way through, like, that it's
Joe Diametti:What does it matter? You're gonna crit anyways.
Rowan Collins:Well, Harold, honey,
Joe Diametti:I'm kidding.
Isaac Allen Burns:Go ahead, Rowan. Crit again.
Rowan Collins:I did not crit again.
Isaac Allen Burns:What do we got?
Rowan Collins:I got a an 11 with hope. Oh, no.
Joe Diametti:11 with hope. You
Isaac Allen Burns:fully your logic goes, if you put this in if you put this in the box, it will be safe from anyone else who tries to get it. But another place it will be safe from anyone trying to get it is around your shoulders. That way, you can actually have have, like, the perception of it. If you're touching it, you'll know where it is. Before you know it, your arms have almost moved by themselves to wrap the oric mantle around you.
Isaac Allen Burns:The following is now true about you. First of all, you gain the oric mantle. Your presence increases by one. Yay. Your max HP, remove one of the slots of your HP.
Isaac Allen Burns:Okay. And you can do this while we're going to the next location. You may gain an additional card from the Splendor domain that is a pro that is of half your level or lower, which in this case will be one. So you can get a first level Splendor card and add that to your load out. As the three of you are standing there, you see that DJ has put on the oric mantle.
Isaac Allen Burns:And once again, a similar effect to what you saw with Katarina, this compulsion to listen to whatever DJ says kind of erupts within you. At the same time, you notice on the table, on the little desk in there, is a big sheet of paper with an address on it. And there's a little note in the marginalia of it that says, don't let anyone know our secret base location is this place.
Annie Hawthorne:This is why you don't write down your evil plans. Everyone take notes.
Isaac Allen Burns:Very good. What do you three do?
Annie Hawthorne:Well, I think we should go to this address. What do you think DJ?
Rowan Collins:DJ is uncomfortable with the fact that you are attentively listening. Has DJ has stage fright, which I think is really funny. We believe you are correct, Mae. We believe that that is what we should do next.
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, good. Well, DJ said it, so we should do it. Do you agree, Kenzie?
Isaac Allen Burns:I
Annie Hawthorne:I don't really care about your opinion, but we should go.
Joe Diametti:Okay. This was fun.
Isaac Allen Burns:The two of you aren't even, like you don't even feel any anger about the fact you don't have the mantle. You're just like, obviously, DJ should've had the mantle.
Annie Hawthorne:DJ is the best of us.
Isaac Allen Burns:And DJ, we trust. And DJ, we trust. DJ leads the way through
Joe Diametti:Splendor has chosen DJ.
Rowan Collins:DJ is incredibly uncomfortable.
Isaac Allen Burns:The three of you walk down the Cobblestones Road as the sun is about to crest its highest point in the day, which as we know, this is the longest day. You see people walking to and fro with less pep in their step. The spring solstice festival is not gonna happen. Little do they know, there's a whole army just outside the town ready to pounce. What is gonna happen?
Isaac Allen Burns:The three of you, follow the path, follow the address, and you find you've walked up some stone steps. So these stairs sort of go up the side of the cliffs here. As you can see, there are multiple buildings hewn into the side of the cliff. And this stair is sort of a main passageway for a lot of it. So you could almost like a fire you know how a fire escape is?
Isaac Allen Burns:Imagine that, but big and for multiple buildings. DJ, the whole way that you've been walking, people have been passing by and looking at you with wide eyed wonder at you.
Rowan Collins:We are so glad we cannot see.
Isaac Allen Burns:Everyone else sees this.
Joe Diametti:DJ, that person is pointing at you in awe. DJ, that person and that group, that family seems really impressed with you.
Annie Hawthorne:Well, why wouldn't they be?
Joe Diametti:I mean, I'm impressed with you.
Annie Hawthorne:I'm also impressed with you.
Joe Diametti:That's why I want you to
Joe Diametti:know when everyone's impressed with you.
Rowan Collins:We are uncomfortable with all this attention.
Joe Diametti:Those people are actively cheering for the way that you're walking.
Rowan Collins:We don't wanna walk anymore. We are going to stand
Annie Hawthorne:I'll pick you up and carry you.
Rowan Collins:We don't need to be carried. We appreciate this.
Joe Diametti:Why are these people asking for your autograph?
Rowan Collins:We don't have signatures we cannot read or write.
Annie Hawthorne:We also don't have thumbs.
Rowan Collins:We also don't have thumbs.
Isaac Allen Burns:Speaking of which, Kinsey and May, pick one between you to make a instinct roll for me.
Joe Diametti:Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Apparent to me that you couldn't see it.
Isaac Allen Burns:That really worked for an audio for me.
Annie Hawthorne:The first
Joe Diametti:one was a tie scissors, and the second one, she beat me with rocks and scissors.
Rowan Collins:Course, lesbian throws me.
Isaac Allen Burns:Speaking of scissors, what what was Jesus. What a horny podcast this is all of a sudden. My god. Annie, what's your role
Annie Hawthorne:again? A 19 with hope.
Isaac Allen Burns:19 with hope. May, as you're walking up the steps, you notice something. There is an individual. They are dressed in what you can tell in the flashes at which you notice them in sort of a brown cloak covering most of them. They are definitely following you.
Isaac Allen Burns:They are a smaller individual, likely a halfling of sorts. They stick to the shadows. They stick to the roofs. They are keeping a distance away from you such that they could get away if you confront them, but they are simply following.
Annie Hawthorne:I wanna see if I can intercept this person in a way that they would have to confront me.
Isaac Allen Burns:Do the two of y'all continue up the warehouse? The two others in the party?
Joe Diametti:I mean, I'm not aware of
Rowan Collins:it. Are you carrying me?
Joe Diametti:Yes.
Annie Hawthorne:Then, yes.
Isaac Allen Burns:That's cute. Kinsey and DJ walking up the steps. DJ getting a shoulders ride or a piggyback ride?
Joe Diametti:No. I'm holding.
Isaac Allen Burns:Like a baby.
Joe Diametti:Yeah. Like like in just in front of me, kinda up, like, against my chest.
Isaac Allen Burns:Mae, you are standing to the side. You see the figure kind of sneaking up the stairs, coming to the landing that you are on. Are you trying to be sneaky? Are you trying to hide? Or are you just Trying
Annie Hawthorne:to get them to walk past me so that I can trip them.
Isaac Allen Burns:So you're just, like, in plain sight?
Annie Hawthorne:No. I'm, like, off to the side. Like, if the stairs are going up and there's, like, a little alleyway off to the side, I'm, like, around the corner. Okay. I'm just gonna put my foot out.
Isaac Allen Burns:We're gonna say an agility check to see if you can get around that corner and out of sight without this guy absolutely seeing that happen.
Annie Hawthorne:That's a 12 with hope.
Isaac Allen Burns:12 with hope. You walk up, you get to the landing, He gets to the landing, and you see that he throws back his hood. And he's got these long curly ringlets that go down his head, beautiful brown hair, got scintillating blue eyes. And he says, you can come on out. I saw you go back there.
Isaac Allen Burns:You're with my person of interest, so come on out. We can have a conversation.
Annie Hawthorne:It's not honorable to skulk through shadows like that.
Isaac Allen Burns:Well, that's coming from someone hiding behind an alley right now, isn't it? So
Annie Hawthorne:Step out. Hey. What do you want?
Isaac Allen Burns:Those are some strong arms you got there. You a fighter?
Annie Hawthorne:Wouldn't you like to find out?
Isaac Allen Burns:Well, not really my type.
Annie Hawthorne:You said a person of interest. Which of my companions are you tracking?
Isaac Allen Burns:Tracking the one with the beautiful golden mantle on. You know, that's actually of great interest to my people. And you see he reaches under his brown cloak and pulls out the symbol of the Ennead, the nine pointed star. So, yeah, we had suspicions that a relic was here. I just didn't think that someone would be brazen enough to wear it through the streets, causing quite a stir.
Annie Hawthorne:What is your interest in it exactly?
Isaac Allen Burns:Less an interest in it itself and more an interest in keeping that out of the hands of people who don't know how to wield it without getting themselves or a lot of other people hurt.
Annie Hawthorne:I don't think you need to worry about that. It's perfectly safe with us.
Isaac Allen Burns:I think I do need to worry about that, actually, seeing as a lot of crazy things have been happened. I, in fact, just got worried about a couple hours ago that the that mister Bergman's brother passed away in an alley.
Annie Hawthorne:Yes. If they want to murder my friend in an alley, they'll have to go through me, as will you.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, I have no intent on going through anybody. Why don't we keep this really simple and easy? I don't wanna hurt you three. I don't want you to hurt me either. So what do you say that you and I go back up and meet your friends and you give me the mantle?
Isaac Allen Burns:No harm, no foul. No problem.
Annie Hawthorne:I think I say that if you want the mantle, you'll have to go through me.
Isaac Allen Burns:Alright. Well, we tried the easy way. So I guess we're in the hard way now. And I'm gonna expand a fear to allow him to do a move right up front. You see this person holds up the symbol, which glows and a beam fires out at you.
Isaac Allen Burns:They are within close range.
Annie Hawthorne:Close range. I'm gonna use my I see it coming ability. When you are targeted by an attack coming from beyond melee range, Marcus stress to roll a d four and increase your evasion against the attack.
Isaac Allen Burns:Wow. Okay.
Annie Hawthorne:So I'm gonna do No.
Isaac Allen Burns:I roll. He's gonna
Annie Hawthorne:A four.
Isaac Allen Burns:He's gonna make an attack roll. Yeah. I will only be a 13.
Annie Hawthorne:My evasion with my four that I just rolled is a 15.
Isaac Allen Burns:15. You see this beam coming. It blasts past you. This scintillating beam of light that no doubt would have hurt and also hurt your vision. You see, as he does that, he turns and starts running up the stairs towards your friends.
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, as he runs past me, I'm gonna attack him. That's a crit, my friend.
Rowan Collins:Woah. It wasn't me.
Annie Hawthorne:Double twelves.
Isaac Allen Burns:What is happening today?
Annie Hawthorne:Double twelves.
Rowan Collins:The dice say that
Annie Hawthorne:we Okay. Which is I do two d 10 plus five damage with this. So that's 20 plus whatever I roll.
Isaac Allen Burns:Okay. This
Rowan Collins:man's about to get murked.
Annie Hawthorne:I don't know if there's a one shot kill in this game.
Isaac Allen Burns:Well
Annie Hawthorne:That is a 10 out of five. Are we about to find out? 15 plus 20 is 35 plus five is 40. Oh
Rowan Collins:my god.
Isaac Allen Burns:So, hey, it's me, your GM. My name Calvertz. Getting fully warmed on this. Just to be very clear.
Joe Diametti:Mhmm.
Isaac Allen Burns:There is a fourth level at which if they take twice as much their severe threshold, they take four points of damage. This guy only had four HP. So, you know, Annie, describe how Mei kills this individual.
Annie Hawthorne:And he runs past me, or he tries to run past me after just trying to shoot me with a beam of magic. And I'm just gonna pull my greatsword out of its sheath Oh. And, like, spin around right at head level. And just his hat's just gonna fall off. And let's roll.
Annie Hawthorne:Plop, plop, plop down the stairs. Just And I'm just gonna be like, oh, I wasn't expecting that. Oops.
Rowan Collins:Yeah. Indeed.
Isaac Allen Burns:Splatters on the stairs as the head of a clergyman falls. Uh-oh. Up at the top, you two, you have reached a warehouse built into the side of the cliffs. You see that there is a door with one of those sliding windows up at eye level right at the front that seems to be the only entrance into this warehouse.
Joe Diametti:I suppose I can knock.
Rowan Collins:We knock.
Isaac Allen Burns:You knock. You hear it resound behind the door as though there's a large space behind it. And you see the slot slides open, and you hear, what?
Rowan Collins:Hello?
Isaac Allen Burns:What's up?
Rowan Collins:Can we enter?
Isaac Allen Burns:Alright. Clearly, you're one of the new recruits that, colonel Badjoy must be sending us, Solroy. Come on in. You enter in, the two of you. And, Mae, are you going up the stairs right after you've killed this clergyman?
Annie Hawthorne:I am sprinting up the stairs like, we have to be inside right now. I'm sorry. Within. Mae
Isaac Allen Burns:brushes past as the three of you enter in and the door slams behind you. And inside, you see what is clearly a rebel stakeout. You see banners on the wall for the rebel prince Arvan. You see individuals sharpening knives. See one guy clearly taller and bigger than than the rest, a furball of great musculature who stands.
Isaac Allen Burns:And he walks up directly to DJ and says, boy, I'm compelled to speak with you. Any news from colonel Badjoy?
Rowan Collins:Yes. He says stand down.
Isaac Allen Burns:Stand down?
Rowan Collins:Stand down. We must leave. It is unsafe here. We will be cooked into hot dogs and eaten by other people in this festival. We must leave before we are ground up into a paste, put in a casing, and sheathed within.
Isaac Allen Burns:Wow. That was an incredibly visceral description of what will happen to us. Why don't you go ahead and make a presence check?
Joe Diametti:With advantage for because of the
Annie Hawthorne:It's a
Isaac Allen Burns:with advantage because you are wearing the auric mantle.
Rowan Collins:Whoo. Alright. Okay. No. It's not another crit.
Rowan Collins:Just for the record. It was a 21 with hope.
Isaac Allen Burns:You say this to this individual. And just to be clear, this in and of itself will be a social encounter. He does have a stat block that does beat his difficulty, though, just to be clear. He looks and says, stand down. Alright.
Isaac Allen Burns:Clearly, the colonel will have a backup plan for this, so we'll stand down for now. And behind him, you hear a guy yell out, but wait, sergeant. We have to be standing guard. This could be a test. You know that colonel Snaketalker likes to do this kind of thing where he sends bad guys.
Isaac Allen Burns:How do we know that you three are on the level? And he tears his eyes away from DJ to the two of you and says, your sword has, like, blood on it.
Annie Hawthorne:Oh, yes. I just killed a clergyman.
Isaac Allen Burns:You killed a clergyman?
Annie Hawthorne:Tell me that you people don't like clergyman, please.
Isaac Allen Burns:Hardcore. I mean, you know, we're pretty neutral on the clergyman, but that's you must be pretty intense.
Annie Hawthorne:No. He was trying to infiltrate this place. I couldn't let him.
Isaac Allen Burns:Make a I'll let you choose. Either a presence check to focus on the deception of it or a strength check to focus on the don't mess with me aspect of it.
Annie Hawthorne:I'll do strength. Incredible. And just just for, like, some flare, I'm gonna cross my arms. And that way that you, like, push your biceps forward.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, hell yeah. Oh, damn. With the guns.
Rowan Collins:Hell yeah. Let's go.
Annie Hawthorne:Can I use my punch first? Ask questions later because of that.
Isaac Allen Burns:You know what? Seeing as you did just kill somebody and you are kind of intimating a threat of violence, I will say, yes. Sure. Okay. You you may spend a hope to use that experience.
Isaac Allen Burns:Amazing.
Annie Hawthorne:So my strength is plus one. It's gonna be 16 with fear.
Isaac Allen Burns:16 with fear. Okay. That succeeds at a cost. So I'm gonna say that he this is great, actually. So I'm gonna say this individual does stand down.
Isaac Allen Burns:He is not fighting against you, but you can tell that he is suddenly attracted to you.
Rowan Collins:Oh, no.
Isaac Allen Burns:He's turned on by this display of intimidation and domination. Alright. Well, I'll listen to anything you say. Hey. Inside, it's not good to wear shoes.
Isaac Allen Burns:Why don't you take your shoes off right over here?
Annie Hawthorne:Think I'll keep my shoes on. Thank you.
Isaac Allen Burns:As he says that, a third individual, you see this dwarven woman pipes up and says, what about the angel boy? He looks like he's not dedicated to the cause. He doesn't look like he's on the side of the rebel prince. Tell us, boy, why should we believe that you're not trying to infiltrate us?
Joe Diametti:No. No. Quite the contrary. I'm here because you're my brothers and sisters. And
Joe Diametti:he sits down crisscross applesauce, and he pops open a shield briefcase, and starts looking through his papers. This one will do. And he grabs his feather from before and he dips it in ink. Brothers and sisters,
Joe Diametti:I'm here because I felt compelled by our god Splendor. All hail Splendor? No? Okay. All
Rowan Collins:hail Splendor. I
Joe Diametti:felt compelled to Splendor wants to be on Prince Arvind's side and yours. For a mere signature, we will have God's Splendor's protection.
Isaac Allen Burns:Okay. Yeah. Make a presence roll for me.
Joe Diametti:Alright. Presence is minus one. Why did I do this?
Isaac Allen Burns:Why did you do this? I thought my the
Rowan Collins:idea was
Joe Diametti:that he was gonna be so awkward that and not a good salesperson at all.
Isaac Allen Burns:That's true. That's actually that's actually really great. DJ, would you are you saying you want to give the help action of someone?
Rowan Collins:I wanna,
Isaac Allen Burns:like About that.
Rowan Collins:Play the same music because what do we do? The same swelling of music again.
Isaac Allen Burns:Oh, you wanna do the light trick?
Annie Hawthorne:Yeah.
Isaac Allen Burns:The illusory light trick? Yes. Does that require a spellcasting role?
Rowan Collins:It does not. I can just do
Isaac Allen Burns:it. Incredible.
Rowan Collins:Wait, I
Joe Diametti:can mark to stress to make my fear roll a hope roll as part of my ancestry trait called fearless. So I got a 14 with fear, but I could mark two stress to make that a hope. So I'm gonna do that. And one and two, and now that's a 14 with hope. Wow.
Isaac Allen Burns:14 with hope. Wow. Okay. With you saying these things, you can tell immediately. You don't have everybody on your side.
Isaac Allen Burns:Not everybody is signed in, but you see a couple people kind of looking up and they say, wow, you know, I felt like I was really lost and I feel like I dedicated myself to this because I was really looking for purpose as though I didn't really know what to believe in. But those few words have convinced me that I think I also want Splendor to whatever that thing you said earlier.
Joe Diametti:Yes. Sign, brothers and sisters, Wow.
Joe Diametti:And let in the sweet, sweet splendor. Splendor. Splendor. Splendor. Splendor.
Joe Diametti:Splendor.
Isaac Allen Burns:Splendor. Splendor. You see a couple of people are like, alright. Relax. Relax.
Isaac Allen Burns:Relax. You see the big guys like, alright. Whoever wants to be with splendor, you go with this guy. Everyone else is still dedicated to the cause for the prince. We're gonna go ahead and stand down like these three individuals have convinced us because they all rolled really well.
Isaac Allen Burns:So we're not gonna get into a fight. No fighting today. And, also, the other thing that would have caused a fight is probably dead now. So there's no chance of a fight happening here. See, against 40 damage is a lot of damage.
Isaac Allen Burns:Am I right, everybody? See that he
Rowan Collins:understand what you're talking about.
Isaac Allen Burns:You see that he says, alright. War won't happen today. We will retreat. We, the vanguard, will let the main force know to stand down and wait for further instructions. No war on this day.
Isaac Allen Burns:Today will be a day of peace. You hear footsteps coming up the stairs, and you see Katarina. She has arrived, and she says, hi, everyone. I followed you because we have terrible news. We have to figure out what to do about the festival.
Isaac Allen Burns:Do any of you do you know what we can do? If only there were at least 11 people who could help us make this festival happen the way it's supposed to.
Rowan Collins:We would love to help. Isn't that right? DJ looks over at the group and at the group of of rebels and goes, wouldn't everybody love to help?
Isaac Allen Burns:You see that the big guy says, oh, no. Not really. We have something else we gotta do, but I
Rowan Collins:appreciate it. To help.
Isaac Allen Burns:Yes. We'll help because we follow you now. And so that is the story of how the first ever Peace Day occurred. There was music. There was dancing.
Isaac Allen Burns:The spring solstice went off without a hitch. And for one more day, war did not come to Shartan and to Highcliffe. It would come a year later though. But that one day was peaceful, And everyone, for some reason, remembers these three individuals in the history books. And as you see, Timothy we shoot back July in the future, and Timothy finishes that whole story and turns around and looks at everyone in the classroom.
Isaac Allen Burns:Wait.
Rowan Collins:Is that why we eat hot dogs on that day?
Joe Diametti:Is that why we dye them green?
Isaac Allen Burns:That's exactly right.
Rowan Collins:Is that why we don't say the word inside anymore? We use the word within?
Isaac Allen Burns:That's right. We only say the word within on Peace Day. And it's green in honor of the one rational orc person in the whole thing. Because at the end of the day, clearly from the stories, Mae had things together. Oh.
Isaac Allen Burns:And then the credits roll. And then we bring this we bring this one shot to a close. Well, thank you everybody for listening. This was a little one shot that we did on the side to use new rules. Unfortunately, perhaps the fault of me, the GM, for not making things a little harder.
Isaac Allen Burns:We did not actually get to any of the new rules. So who knows if we don't make the executive decision to not release this. Who knows? Maybe we'll try again. Anyways, we just wanna thank everybody for listening.
Isaac Allen Burns:And with that, why don't we all sign off? Squawk on three. One, two, three. Squawk. Squawk.
Isaac Allen Burns:Okay. Hey. It's a podcast.